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Some things we can't comprehend. Not because we don't care or don't want to, but because our perspective is so different.
Police get trained continually on how to survive. They wear body armor, carry a belt full of tools, and the best ones can talk their way out of some bad situations. It's a small comfort to their wives who are left on their own to cope, and hope they don't get "The Call".
I never thought what it must be like to be married to an officer until Jill Johler, wife of BNPD officer Bob Johler, signed the guestbook. She later wrote:
As the spouse of an officer I spend far to much time visualizing the traffic stop gone bad or the domestic call that turned into a homicide. I no longer watch cop shows on TV because they further amplify the fears. Although on the outside I appear completely at ease with his career, on the inside I am tense. I think I am also a bit jealous. He has chosen a path of dignity and pride for the sheer desire of wanting to help his fellow man. Any officer or spouse of one can tell you that they do not choose their jobs for the money. It surely isn't for the respect either.
Most people assume that these men and women spend 90% of their time in the local donut shop or quick-mart. The other 10% is spent giving 'law abiding' citizens tickets for no good reason. The truth of the matter is that they are the ones who are there before anyone else when an emergency arises. Not all calls are for crimes. Some are for elderly people who need help during the most embarrassing of moments. My husband seems to get a lot of those. To you and me, that might be a piddly thing to do but, think about it from the person in needs point of view. These men and women have to be strong, authoritative and compassionate people and be able to change mind frames in the blink of an eye. One minute they are arresting a criminal and the next they are calming a scared little child. You have to realize that they see things that we can't imagine. Cases of neglect, both physical and emotional stick with you whether you want them to or not. All of these things are brought home. Some are shared with the family and I am sure some are tucked away inside. For those that they share, it is our duty to listen and support them. They deserve our support and a ton of our respect.
So our husbands and wives will still work the beat, while we still go about our lives worrying whether we will get 'that' call. We will stand proudly by and show no fear as we pray for a safe return.
I'd like to include the thoughts of other spouses. Email me with your thoughts. You can remain anonymous if you wish.
Back home.
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